I realize I’ve been away for awhile, but things here at home have been crazy.

My son is still in foster care; still pretty much ignoring us and doing whatever he wants, totally focused on his own wants, i.e., his driver’s license. His last visit was almost two weeks ago, and I suppose it went as well as could be expected, considering we are supposedly so dangerous we still need supervised visitation.

You know, where the caseworker sits there reading a book the entire time? And we’re supposed to interact like an intact family? And make progress toward that elusive, subjective “family reunification”?

Yep, that’s it. Fun, huh?

In the meantime, after a day in the ER and several days in the hospital, my husband was diagnosed with kidney cancer. He had a nephrectomy on June 1, hence the visit a few days prior. Which our son did not care about in the least.

Let’s take a moment to compare, if you will: my stepmother drove across the state to spend several days with us, helping out with our youngest child and keeping the home fires burning; our older daughter sat with us in pre-op and, of course, visited her dad in the hospital. Our other daughter flew in from another state to stay for a week to help us.

And what did our drama-loving son do? Nothing. Oh, he listened to my updates on the surgery and so forth; he responded, briefly, if I texted him or messaged him. But it always came back to him: his situation, his license, his life.

Then again, I was raised to be available for one’s family – we have other members who don’t seem to care about our recent troubles either. But I wasn’t involved in raising them, so I will take no responsibility for their actions. Really, though, you’d think an occasional phone call or visit or even, heaven forbid, responding positively to an outright request for assistance would not be out of the realm of possibility. I’m just sayin’….

So, we may or may not have court in two days, a trial to determine…. Wait a minute – what exactly IS going to be determined? The state has made allegations, but no one is really clear on who is being accused. The judge appears to want more information on why my husband cannot attend court – apparently having a kidney removed, a recent cancer diagnosis, and using Vicodin for pain control are not valid reasons for postponing a court date.

We wait, and wonder….

2 comments on “Update

  1. Antya says:


    I am sorry to hear all of this news. Have your husband’s doctors contact the Judge directly and see what the Judge says. I am praying for all of you that everything will work out for the best.


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